Day +19/+20 (Like a newborn ...)

A difficult thing for me as a parent, probably like every other parent, is to hear my children cry. However, recently, the most difficult thing is to hear Hunter cry and not know what to do about it, or not be able to do anything about it.

Hunter woke up in the early evening last night and cried and cried. I tried to hold him, comfort him and it didn't help. The nurse, after my prompting, gave him an extra dose of pain medicine. Although I wasn't certain he was actually in pain, as opposed to being extremely fatigued. He eventually quieted down and, after two solid hours, fell back asleep.

This morning, after what was for all intents and purposes a "good" morning, Hunter cried and cried. Again, I tried to hold him, comfort him but to no avail. The whole scenario was an instant replay of last night, except he fell asleep after an hour. And like last night, I'm left wondering what the reality of his situation was.

It reminds me of when Hunter and Harper were newborns. We spent so much time trying to determine if they were hungry, dirty, tired, gassy and the list goes on. We tried to figure out what each cry, whimper, yawn, coo and yelp meant. It took some time, but slowly we started to figure things out.

I sit here and think to myself Hunter's transplant was just twenty days ago. He is like a newborn. He's relearning how to eat, how to walk, how to talk/express himself, how to do most everything all over again. And we're relearning how and what to feed him, when to put him down for a nap, when and when not to push him.

I realize he'll have his good days and bad days. I suppose we will too.

P.S. Speaking of newborns, welcome to the world Cayden Rothfield and Soleil Wicks!